furry little problem

A Memorandum, to the Squirrel:
The tomatoes are NOT YOURS. I planted them and looked after them, therefore they are mine. The fact that you are willing to spend all day watching them and waiting for your opportunity, while I have better things to do, is irrelevant.

However, if you MUST steal the tomatoes, please to finish them instead of leaving half-eaten ones under the trees, because THAT is just adding insult to injury.
- Rain

AAARRGHHH. I am considering a scarecrow, but I don't think it would fool him for very long.

Malfi-fic: The Sin of Pandarus

Um. I'm not really sure how to explain this. It just happened.

Title: The Sin of Pandarus
Summary: Daniel de Bosola follows orders.
Rating: PG-13; i.e. Wrong on Many Levels, but not graphically so.
Disclaimer: I disclaim everything. This is entirely the fault of nineveh_uk, who planted the idea of Ferdinand of Calabria / Strong-Thighed Bargeman slash in my head, whence it refused to depart. Well, it's also a little bit the fault of Google, because I discovered last week that when you type in "Duchess of Malfi" + fanfiction, the first hit is my journal, and I thought it would be unfair not to deliver.

( The Sin of Pandarus )