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Because it's been ages since I've done one of these posts, and because hunting for amusing summaries is way more fun than doing actual work. As always, bizarre R&J AUs never go out of style...
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super-short Duchess of Malfi fic
Nov. 21st, 2015 06:31 pmDance of Death
I. In his last days, the Cardinal supposed death to be the end; he had long since lost faith in anything else. He is not ready for what comes after: his mistress, as pretty and lively and vain and covetous as she was in life.
For a moment, her face is reassuringly familiar. Then she bends to kiss him, and the poison on her lips burns like one material fire.
II. Antonio had hoped to see his wife face to face, in that other world; but when he sees Cariola first, he understands that it is fitting. They were good friends. They also, without meaning to, betrayed one another. He does not know what to say to her. You would have lived to marry, he thinks, if I had not. He is glad that she does not seem angry.
She takes him by the hand, and he rises. Come, I will bring you where your lady is.
III. Their small hands will not be still, even in death, and they will not let him lie still either. They grab and tug at him, importunate, in the way of children demanding to play with a favorite uncle.
I never meant to sin against you, Ferdinand thinks, I hated you only because you might have been mine. Why am I to be punished with you for eternity?
IV. He hoped, so many times, that Lord Ferdinand would not send him to her again. Now, after all, he would like to speak to her: Let me explain, I tried to give you justice, I meant to save your husband’s life, but it was all too late, too soon, all wrong, and I suppose this must be the road to hell because you know what they say about good intentions, but you must believe me when I say I tried to send you to heaven. But the dead do not, precisely, speak; and the only word that fills Bosola’s soul is Mercy?
She lays her hand upon the wound that Ferdinand gave him, and he is healed. Mercy.
I. In his last days, the Cardinal supposed death to be the end; he had long since lost faith in anything else. He is not ready for what comes after: his mistress, as pretty and lively and vain and covetous as she was in life.
For a moment, her face is reassuringly familiar. Then she bends to kiss him, and the poison on her lips burns like one material fire.
II. Antonio had hoped to see his wife face to face, in that other world; but when he sees Cariola first, he understands that it is fitting. They were good friends. They also, without meaning to, betrayed one another. He does not know what to say to her. You would have lived to marry, he thinks, if I had not. He is glad that she does not seem angry.
She takes him by the hand, and he rises. Come, I will bring you where your lady is.
III. Their small hands will not be still, even in death, and they will not let him lie still either. They grab and tug at him, importunate, in the way of children demanding to play with a favorite uncle.
I never meant to sin against you, Ferdinand thinks, I hated you only because you might have been mine. Why am I to be punished with you for eternity?
IV. He hoped, so many times, that Lord Ferdinand would not send him to her again. Now, after all, he would like to speak to her: Let me explain, I tried to give you justice, I meant to save your husband’s life, but it was all too late, too soon, all wrong, and I suppose this must be the road to hell because you know what they say about good intentions, but you must believe me when I say I tried to send you to heaven. But the dead do not, precisely, speak; and the only word that fills Bosola’s soul is Mercy?
She lays her hand upon the wound that Ferdinand gave him, and he is healed. Mercy.
Gentleman Jole & the Red Queen
Oct. 21st, 2015 10:32 pmOK, so I downloaded the eARC as soon as it became available, and then read the whole thing in a couple of hours, because apparently I have no will power. (Also, I didn't have any class prep or grading to do today, but I did have a two-hour "strategic-planning priorities conversation session" that consisted, seriously, of the upper administration making us write headlines about our university that we hoped might appear in the Chronicle of Higher Education in 2021. After that, I figured I deserved some shameless self-indulgence.)
Non-spoilery first impressions: This is definitely light romantic-comedy fluff, mostly a nostalgic visit with beloved characters rather than anything terribly high-stakes. (That is to say, the characters do make life choices that have a lot of weight for them, personally, but there aren't any wrenching moral dilemmas or catastrophic threats.) I, personally, have no problem whatsoever with this. If you are looking for a lot of plot, or a lot of angst, you will probably be disappointed.
Slightly-more-spoilery reactions under the cut, although no real giveaways about the main character arcs or plot.
( Slightly-more-spoilery stuff )
Non-spoilery first impressions: This is definitely light romantic-comedy fluff, mostly a nostalgic visit with beloved characters rather than anything terribly high-stakes. (That is to say, the characters do make life choices that have a lot of weight for them, personally, but there aren't any wrenching moral dilemmas or catastrophic threats.) I, personally, have no problem whatsoever with this. If you are looking for a lot of plot, or a lot of angst, you will probably be disappointed.
Slightly-more-spoilery reactions under the cut, although no real giveaways about the main character arcs or plot.
( Slightly-more-spoilery stuff )Canterbury Tales fic: Renaissance
Oct. 16th, 2015 01:54 pmOK, so this has literally been sitting on my hard drive for years, so I figured it was high time I posted it, even though I'm still not sure the ending is much of an ending. Also, I feel like I should apologize to all medievalists ever for the title, but it stubbornly refused to be called anything else.
I note that there is a 500+-year tradition of Canterbury Tales fic, including fanboy self-insertion, pairing canon characters with OCs, and femmeslash, but I'm pretty sure this is the only Clerk / Wife of Bath's Niece fic, like, ever.
In which the Clerk loses a bet and gets offered a new job, and we find out what sort of mother Alison of Bath would make...
( Renaissance )
I note that there is a 500+-year tradition of Canterbury Tales fic, including fanboy self-insertion, pairing canon characters with OCs, and femmeslash, but I'm pretty sure this is the only Clerk / Wife of Bath's Niece fic, like, ever.
In which the Clerk loses a bet and gets offered a new job, and we find out what sort of mother Alison of Bath would make...
( Renaissance )AAARGHH, No Fear Shakespeare
Sep. 12th, 2015 08:22 am(First of all, I don't know why I do this to myself, but I was looking for the "most capricious poet" quote, and No Fear Shakespeare was the first site that popped up.)
Real Shakespeare:
Touchstone: I am here with thee and thy goats, as the most capricious poet, honest Ovid, was among the Goths.
Jaques: O knowledge ill-inhabited, worse than Jove in a thatched house!
Touchstone: When a man's verses cannot be understood, or a man's good wit seconded with the forward child, understanding, it strikes a man more dead than a great reckoning in a little room.
No Fear Shakespeare:
Touchstone: Well, I'm out here with you and your goats, in the same way that the witty poet Ovid was abandoned to the barbaric Goths.
Jaques: Oh, knowledge put to such bad use is worse than a god cooped up in a hut.
Touchstone: When a man's jokes fall that flat, it's as depressing as getting a large bill for a short stay in a little room.
Just NO NO NO. So many times no, for so many reasons, but especially because none of this, with the possible exception of the phrase "seconded with the forward child" and the single word "reckoning," actually requires a translation for a native speaker of modern English. What it requires is footnotes: explicating this passage in a way that makes sense means giving your students cultural knowledge, about Ovid, and about Jupiter and Baucis and Philemon*, and about Christopher Marlowe, and possibly even about the etymology of the word "capricious." None of which they are actually going to get from this "translation." And it drives me crazy when "study aids" actively conspire to hide this knowledge from students, instead of helping to uncover it.
(As a side note, why does No Fear Shakespeare automatically change "thou" to "you"? Are there seriously students, even at the high school level, who don't know that "thou" means "you"? As far as I can tell, they're simply assuming it's alienating because it's archaic. Never mind that 1) this is a distinction that encodes important information about characters and relationships in early modern English; and 2) it takes all of three minutes to teach, and students invariably think it's cool when they learn about it.)
* Which makes the whole play so much richer, seriously. Some of the other references may be throwaways, but this one isn't.
Real Shakespeare:
Touchstone: I am here with thee and thy goats, as the most capricious poet, honest Ovid, was among the Goths.
Jaques: O knowledge ill-inhabited, worse than Jove in a thatched house!
Touchstone: When a man's verses cannot be understood, or a man's good wit seconded with the forward child, understanding, it strikes a man more dead than a great reckoning in a little room.
No Fear Shakespeare:
Touchstone: Well, I'm out here with you and your goats, in the same way that the witty poet Ovid was abandoned to the barbaric Goths.
Jaques: Oh, knowledge put to such bad use is worse than a god cooped up in a hut.
Touchstone: When a man's jokes fall that flat, it's as depressing as getting a large bill for a short stay in a little room.
Just NO NO NO. So many times no, for so many reasons, but especially because none of this, with the possible exception of the phrase "seconded with the forward child" and the single word "reckoning," actually requires a translation for a native speaker of modern English. What it requires is footnotes: explicating this passage in a way that makes sense means giving your students cultural knowledge, about Ovid, and about Jupiter and Baucis and Philemon*, and about Christopher Marlowe, and possibly even about the etymology of the word "capricious." None of which they are actually going to get from this "translation." And it drives me crazy when "study aids" actively conspire to hide this knowledge from students, instead of helping to uncover it.
(As a side note, why does No Fear Shakespeare automatically change "thou" to "you"? Are there seriously students, even at the high school level, who don't know that "thou" means "you"? As far as I can tell, they're simply assuming it's alienating because it's archaic. Never mind that 1) this is a distinction that encodes important information about characters and relationships in early modern English; and 2) it takes all of three minutes to teach, and students invariably think it's cool when they learn about it.)
* Which makes the whole play so much richer, seriously. Some of the other references may be throwaways, but this one isn't.
miscellaneously fannish
Aug. 21st, 2015 10:31 pm1) OK, so there is a new Guy Gavriel Kay book coming out ...
... set, more or less, in the early modern Eastern Mediterranean ...
... with a motif about "the lives of those not powerful"?
It's vaguely possible that this could somehow be more Relevant To My Interests, but I'm damned if I can see how.
2) I have my new exam copy of the Norton Shakespeare, third edition. Better and wiser minds than mine will probably have a lot to say about the merits of this text, but I will only say that the lines "Bear thou my hand, sweet wench, between thy teeth" and "Groping for trouts in a peculiar river" have been RESTORED -- no longer relegated to an appendix or edited into something more genteel. THANK YOU. (Also, thanks to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
gehayi and lareinenoire for talking me into teaching R2 this semester, because I had a student come up to me after our first class this morning and tell me it was her favorite play.)
3) Bujold Ficathon 2015 is open for sign-ups, prompts, and fills. Also, chapters 7-9 of A Bit Too Much Good Work are up at AO3. Now with 700% more people reciting Shakespeare while doped up on fast-penta than the canon! I should be getting chapter 10 up sometime this weekend.
... set, more or less, in the early modern Eastern Mediterranean ...
... with a motif about "the lives of those not powerful"?
It's vaguely possible that this could somehow be more Relevant To My Interests, but I'm damned if I can see how.
2) I have my new exam copy of the Norton Shakespeare, third edition. Better and wiser minds than mine will probably have a lot to say about the merits of this text, but I will only say that the lines "Bear thou my hand, sweet wench, between thy teeth" and "Groping for trouts in a peculiar river" have been RESTORED -- no longer relegated to an appendix or edited into something more genteel. THANK YOU. (Also, thanks to
gehayi and lareinenoire for talking me into teaching R2 this semester, because I had a student come up to me after our first class this morning and tell me it was her favorite play.)3) Bujold Ficathon 2015 is open for sign-ups, prompts, and fills. Also, chapters 7-9 of A Bit Too Much Good Work are up at AO3. Now with 700% more people reciting Shakespeare while doped up on fast-penta than the canon! I should be getting chapter 10 up sometime this weekend.
fic roundup post
Jul. 24th, 2015 08:32 pmMisc. new and new-old stuff, posted at AO3 over the last month:
-- Chapters 2-6 of A Bit Too Much Good Work, in which most of the major plot strands are set up, and this story finally passes the Bechdel test. Damn, I'd forgotten how confusing and complicated longfic is to write.
-- A couple of spinoff ficlets set in the same general universe, The Fast-Penta Test (young!By, helps if you've read at least one of the others first) and Loyalty (even younger!Rish, stands alone). The latter, I note, is the first thing I've written in this fandom that doesn't have any Vorrutyers in it. I am one-track and predictable.
-- A revised version of Out of This House, my old Tonks-kills-Bellatrix fix-it fic, now tweaked a bit to be more or less Deathly Hallows-compliant (to the extent, obviously, that a "what if" AU can be anything of the sort).
Going to Chile with my dad for a couple of weeks, starting tomorrow. It will be my first time in South America. Should be fun!
-- Chapters 2-6 of A Bit Too Much Good Work, in which most of the major plot strands are set up, and this story finally passes the Bechdel test. Damn, I'd forgotten how confusing and complicated longfic is to write.
-- A couple of spinoff ficlets set in the same general universe, The Fast-Penta Test (young!By, helps if you've read at least one of the others first) and Loyalty (even younger!Rish, stands alone). The latter, I note, is the first thing I've written in this fandom that doesn't have any Vorrutyers in it. I am one-track and predictable.
-- A revised version of Out of This House, my old Tonks-kills-Bellatrix fix-it fic, now tweaked a bit to be more or less Deathly Hallows-compliant (to the extent, obviously, that a "what if" AU can be anything of the sort).
Going to Chile with my dad for a couple of weeks, starting tomorrow. It will be my first time in South America. Should be fun!
... according to how likely it is that the advice "Just have a threesome already" would solve everyone's problems.
( because apparently this is where my mind goes when I have nothing better to do )
( because apparently this is where my mind goes when I have nothing better to do )"A Bit Too Much Good Work" OC list
Jun. 20th, 2015 02:53 pmSo, I've finally started to post the plotty By / Rish casefic I've been hinting about for a while, a.k.a. the story that I went hunting for immediately after finishing Captain Vorpatril's Alliance, discovered that it didn't exist, and then had to write myself. There was no way to write this story without massive numbers of OCs, so this post is intended as a sort of cheat sheet for anyone having trouble keeping track of all the names.
I've thought it best to make this a sticky post and edit and update it as characters are introduced, and to organize the list chapter by chapter, in order not to give away too much up front. (If, say, the cast of characters included "Lord Vorvyctym," "Lord Vorvyctym's brother and heir," "Lord Vorvyctym's wife," "Lord Vorvyctym's wife's lover," and "Lord Vorvyctym's butler," it would be a dead giveaway that Lord Vorvyctym was going to be an important character, and readers could make certain inferences about his role in the plot.) Characters will be listed under the chapter in which they're first mentioned by name, even if they don't actually appear for a while.
Generally, my standard for including a character in this list is "are they going to be mentioned again in a later chapter?" If someone doesn't make the cut -- like the two call girls in Chapter 1 -- you can safely assume that they're not at all important to the plot, although not everyone who makes the list is going to be particularly important.
( The List )
I've thought it best to make this a sticky post and edit and update it as characters are introduced, and to organize the list chapter by chapter, in order not to give away too much up front. (If, say, the cast of characters included "Lord Vorvyctym," "Lord Vorvyctym's brother and heir," "Lord Vorvyctym's wife," "Lord Vorvyctym's wife's lover," and "Lord Vorvyctym's butler," it would be a dead giveaway that Lord Vorvyctym was going to be an important character, and readers could make certain inferences about his role in the plot.) Characters will be listed under the chapter in which they're first mentioned by name, even if they don't actually appear for a while.
Generally, my standard for including a character in this list is "are they going to be mentioned again in a later chapter?" If someone doesn't make the cut -- like the two call girls in Chapter 1 -- you can safely assume that they're not at all important to the plot, although not everyone who makes the list is going to be particularly important.
( The List )meme, from pretty much everyone
Jun. 10th, 2015 06:42 pmShare seven sentences from page 7 of a current WIP:
“I liked it because it was true.”
Stephen was surprised. He had grave doubts about the accuracy of the tale of St. Cecilia, although he supposed he would have to repress them if he ever took holy orders.
“True to her, I mean,” Alison explained. “It wouldn’t have shown well if I had told it. We’re not all made to be saints, and it would be an uncomfortable world to live in if we were, just as much as if we were all sinners. But she believed every word of it, and that is what matters.”
...
And, on a lighter note, because it is jolly well time that I shared some of the By / Rish Epic That Has Eaten My Brain, here is some of Page 7 of that. (There is a Page 77 too, but it is very spoilery.) I ask you to accept that The Mousetrap will still be running in the thirty-first century or whenever it is, because obviously it will be.
...
"You’ll get there someday, and you’ll make far better use of the opportunity than I did. Think about it, Alain: all those glorious works of art, millennia-old castles and cathedrals, battlefields ... and I spent my time experimenting with old-Earth intoxicants. I could have gone to see Shakespeare in London. I didn’t even go to see The Mousetrap, because I was too busy trying to find out what happens if you combine absinthe and hashish.”
“What does happen if you combine absinthe and hashish?”
“Well ... you know how the Galactic Narcotics section of the training manual says THC is an anti-nausea drug? It isn’t a very effective one.”
“I liked it because it was true.”
Stephen was surprised. He had grave doubts about the accuracy of the tale of St. Cecilia, although he supposed he would have to repress them if he ever took holy orders.
“True to her, I mean,” Alison explained. “It wouldn’t have shown well if I had told it. We’re not all made to be saints, and it would be an uncomfortable world to live in if we were, just as much as if we were all sinners. But she believed every word of it, and that is what matters.”
...
And, on a lighter note, because it is jolly well time that I shared some of the By / Rish Epic That Has Eaten My Brain, here is some of Page 7 of that. (There is a Page 77 too, but it is very spoilery.) I ask you to accept that The Mousetrap will still be running in the thirty-first century or whenever it is, because obviously it will be.
...
"You’ll get there someday, and you’ll make far better use of the opportunity than I did. Think about it, Alain: all those glorious works of art, millennia-old castles and cathedrals, battlefields ... and I spent my time experimenting with old-Earth intoxicants. I could have gone to see Shakespeare in London. I didn’t even go to see The Mousetrap, because I was too busy trying to find out what happens if you combine absinthe and hashish.”
“What does happen if you combine absinthe and hashish?”
“Well ... you know how the Galactic Narcotics section of the training manual says THC is an anti-nausea drug? It isn’t a very effective one.”
Misc. middle-European observations
May. 30th, 2015 10:11 pm- Is it just me, or did the Hapsburgs have the worst taste of any ruling family ever? Seriously, their entire approach to building design seems to be "hey, let's put some statues on, and also some eagles because eagles are cool, and some Corinthian columns even though there's nothing for them to hold up, and maybe a few fake hieroglyphs."
- One of the nice things about backpacker hostels is that nobody bats an eye if you fold your laundry in the bar.
- I do not speak German with any facility. But still less do I speak Slovak or Hungarian.
- I am never traveling without a smartphone again. How did I never know how useful these things are?
- One of the nice things about backpacker hostels is that nobody bats an eye if you fold your laundry in the bar.
- I do not speak German with any facility. But still less do I speak Slovak or Hungarian.
- I am never traveling without a smartphone again. How did I never know how useful these things are?
ficspam, and travel plans
May. 18th, 2015 09:02 pmPosted the last bit of the Vorrutyers-now-being-slightly-less-performative series to AO3: Dirty Angel, missing scene between Dono and By right after the Council of Counts vote.
Going to Budapest tomorrow, not really sure where after that. (The nice thing about Budapest is that there is basically no direction you can travel from there that will not be interesting.) If anybody has particular favorite destinations in the Hungary / Austria / Slovakia corner of the world, please tell me about them! (I have a bit less than three weeks to play with, which is not really long enough, but it was as much travel as I could squeeze in between conferences.)
Going to Budapest tomorrow, not really sure where after that. (The nice thing about Budapest is that there is basically no direction you can travel from there that will not be interesting.) If anybody has particular favorite destinations in the Hungary / Austria / Slovakia corner of the world, please tell me about them! (I have a bit less than three weeks to play with, which is not really long enough, but it was as much travel as I could squeeze in between conferences.)
(no subject)
May. 7th, 2015 02:34 pmSomebody translated my Jane Austen fic into French! I am ridiculously flattered.
Vorkosigan fic: Cold Case
Apr. 29th, 2015 09:42 pmPart Four of the ever-growing Vorrutyers Doing Stuff During ACC series (I think I need a better title than that). In which Byerly decides to investigate the lightflyer crash that killed Pierre's third fiancee.
Blanket warning for Richars-related content, although "exactly how awful is Richars?" is kind of the crux of this one, and for Vaguely Exploitative Spy Sex.
( Cold Case )
( Notes )
Blanket warning for Richars-related content, although "exactly how awful is Richars?" is kind of the crux of this one, and for Vaguely Exploitative Spy Sex.
( Cold Case )( Notes )fandom corrupts my brain
Apr. 19th, 2015 07:10 pm:: goes looking to see if anyone else is writing ImpSec casefic ::
:: types "Imp-" into the tag search box on AO3 ::
Impala sex? This is a thing that people write about? Often enough for it to pop up in a list of commonly used tags?
... Oh. Sex in an Impala. Not sex with impalas. Or, you know, some sort of "everyone's an impala" AU that happens to include sex.
:: ponders the fact that for half a minute, the other two possibilities actually sounded plausible ::
ETA: So I seem to have written "everyone's an impala" HP crackfic in the comments. I think I really, really don't want to grade papers tonight. If anybody feels like taking a shot at another fandom, have fun!
:: types "Imp-" into the tag search box on AO3 ::
Impala sex? This is a thing that people write about? Often enough for it to pop up in a list of commonly used tags?
... Oh. Sex in an Impala. Not sex with impalas. Or, you know, some sort of "everyone's an impala" AU that happens to include sex.
:: ponders the fact that for half a minute, the other two possibilities actually sounded plausible ::
ETA: So I seem to have written "everyone's an impala" HP crackfic in the comments. I think I really, really don't want to grade papers tonight. If anybody feels like taking a shot at another fandom, have fun!
So I wrote, uh, Ivan-and-Byerly-dispose-of-a-corpse fic, because apparently when you spend your office hours browsing the Bujold listserv, you end up developing a strong conviction that this is a thing that needs to exist. (It also ended up being fairly long, so I figured I'd link rather than cross-posting.)
ficlet: Twenty-One Girls
Mar. 28th, 2015 04:20 pmVaguely inspired by the excerpt from the new book, although not really spoilery. In which Ivan serves as Miles's voting proxy, and has to deal with an unusually large number of female lobbyists.
( Twenty-One Girls )
( Twenty-One Girls )OK, so I have not done the obligatory EEE NEW VORKOSIGAN BOOK! post, because I didn't really have much to say besides 1) EEE NEW BOOK; 2) Huh, weird title; and 3) Oh crap, I'd better get on with the Giant Monster Fic Eating My Hard Drive before it becomes hopelessly jossed.*
However! While poking around on the Bujold listserv archives (which you really shouldn't do, by the way, unless you want to lose an entire afternoon), I saw that someone had posted a longer excerpt from the publisher, which is Most Exciting, and I thought I'd share.
( more teaserish than spoilery, but under a cut just in case )
However! While poking around on the Bujold listserv archives (which you really shouldn't do, by the way, unless you want to lose an entire afternoon), I saw that someone had posted a longer excerpt from the publisher, which is Most Exciting, and I thought I'd share.
( more teaserish than spoilery, but under a cut just in case )Vorkosigan fic: We're All Mad Here
Mar. 5th, 2015 10:43 pmPart Three of an occasional series of behind-the-scenes of A Civil Campaign one-shots. In which Dono flirts briefly with convention, and then breaks up with convention to flirt with Olivia.
Hat tip to Umberto Eco for the labyrinth, tonineveh_uk for noting the absence of one particular class of puns in the books, and to various online spam ads for ... well, you'll see.
( We're All Mad Here )
Hat tip to Umberto Eco for the labyrinth, to
nineveh_uk for noting the absence of one particular class of puns in the books, and to various online spam ads for ... well, you'll see.( We're All Mad Here )fic for Ash Wednesday
Feb. 18th, 2015 11:38 amSo I guess I wrote, um, RPF? It was meant to be a light-hearted story about William Shakespeare and his teenaged daughters reading bad 16th-century angstfic together, but somehow it went all religious, so I figured this would be a good day to post it.
Italicized passages are quotes from either the Geneva Bible, or Nicholas Breton's The Miseries of Mavillia (it should be obvious which is which); I've also borrowed heavily from the Geneva phrasing of the parable of the talents. Breton, by the way, would have fit right in with Anne of Green Gables and her Story Club.
This is maybe a little early for Will to be living with the Mountjoy family, but I figure he played around with historical timelines all the time, so why can't I?
( Lent )
Italicized passages are quotes from either the Geneva Bible, or Nicholas Breton's The Miseries of Mavillia (it should be obvious which is which); I've also borrowed heavily from the Geneva phrasing of the parable of the talents. Breton, by the way, would have fit right in with Anne of Green Gables and her Story Club.
This is maybe a little early for Will to be living with the Mountjoy family, but I figure he played around with historical timelines all the time, so why can't I?
( Lent )
